TRUE BEAUTY

This article was inspired by the sight of the most beautiful girl in America of 1933 on television. She is presently 78 years old, she looked so ugly that it was hard for me to believe that she was one time miss America.
With such sight, I came to a conclusion that true beauty is intrinsic rather than extrinsic. No matter how beautiful you are today physically, you will someday become so ugly.
And that is why I would rather spend money, energy, time, and resources building my inside than building my outside.
Paul of Tarsus said, “Physical exercise profits little...” Taking care of your body profits but a little. The main purpose of your body is to house the real you (which you cannot see) for the accomplishment of your purpose. Your body is not you just like your clothing is not you. The reason we need the body is for visibility.
I have seen so many ladies who are very beautiful physiologically but cannot speak good English. While I have seen some others who can speak good English but have nothing to offer intellectually. Or have you not seen heartbroken beautiful ladies?
If I am faced between marrying a girl who is physically beautiful but internally ugly and a girl who is physically ugly but internally beautiful. I will not think twice before choosing the later (But she will have both). Physical beauty fades but internal beauty lasts a life time. And this internal beauty I am talking about does not fall on people, it is not a gift. It is developed consciously by personal development.
So many people are beautiful, cute, and handsome outside but beasts inside- If you hear some of them talk, you will pray for the ground to open up and swallow you because they are either too shallow minded or they are talking virus.
People will always prefer to buy cloths than books- that’s exactly what we are talking about. The opportunity cost of that is success. Any time you put fun and material things ahead of intangible values that are delivered through knowledge; you have showed us that you value your outside more than your inside.
Guys be warned about marrying a lady solely because of her physique. Listen to the advice of Charles Spurgeon: “To marry a woman for her look is like eating a bird for its song, since you do not marry her to look at her face but to have her as companion and a help mate. Observe the formation of her mind as well as the features of her face.”

UNILIFE

Philosophy: “Every day is a class room, every experience a lesson and everybody we meet a teacher”- Dr Myles Munroe
Life is a school and we are students of this school called ‘University of life (unilife)’. You may not be a student of any school per say, but you are a student of life.
In the universities of the world you get schooling but in the University of Life you get concrete education. But it is one thing to pass through life and it is another thing to allow life pass through you. You may not have been to the four walls of a University, but you can learn from the spherical shape of the world.
The University of the World is limited but the University of Life is limitless. The University of the World is just for four years or more, but the University of Life starts from when you were born to when you die i.e. it starts from the womb and ends in the tomb.
In the University of Life there are no breaks except the one you give yourself but there are exams, but also the exams do not have time table- It comes up every day of your life. The exam of life is not written, it is most times scored based on your actions.
In the University of Life you have roommates but this time around the roommates are your fellow human beings. So you have to be patient and tolerant to cope with them. In the University of Life, your lectures are your experiences, your school is located everywhere and your Chancellor is God.
We have 6.5 billion students of Unilife, but it is a pity that not up to 2.5 billion students will graduate with first class or second class upper- More than 2 billion carry over’s. When you were born, you were admitted, when you die- You will be convocated. Your course of endeavor is your profession or career.
Life is a school, life is a lesson, life is an experience, and life is a journey. In life you learn, unlearn, and relearn! You cannot succeed if you fail to learn from the wisdom and experience of life that has been before you came. Life is the best teacher I have ever seen, but it’s also a pity that its students fail to pay attention to its unfailing knowledge and details. In life, there are two things you pay; attention and fees. It is better to pay attention and not pay fees than to pay fees and not pay attention. When you pay attention, you will be able to pay the fees.
Life is full of opportunities but you may call it problems. Life is full of Miracles but you may call it obstacles. Life is full of wisdom but you might call it foolishness. Life is full of experiences but you might call it challenges. Life is full of life! Life is a battle field- You have to fight your way to the top!
Quote: “When life gives you ten reasons to cry, make sure you give it one thousand reasons to laugh”

BREAKING UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

The same way we have killer diseases such as cancer, HIV/AIDS and so on. We also have killer diseases of the soul, of which unhealthy relationships is an integral part of.
One thing people have failed to recognize is that relationships play a vital role in our lives; it determines between success and failure, poor and rich, it determines our ultimate destiny. It either makes or mars us.
Show me your friend and I will not only tell you who you are, I ill also predict what you ill become. If you were asked to write down the seven closest people to you, who would they be? Will they look like the future you desire? If they do not then they are not worthy to be on that list.
Anthony Robbins a professional speaker and psychologist wanted to become a billionaire, at that time he was already a millionaire. After like one year of setting that goal, he never attained it, so he decided to seek mentorship from a billionaire. On getting there, the billionaire mentors asked him if his seven closest friends were billionaires and guess what? They weren’t. So he decided to change his friends to billionaires. After he did in less than one year he became a billionaire. That’s the power of relationships. Therefore I make bold to tell you that some relationships are vision blockers and vision blurters.
Relationship is not by force, it is by choice. One thing I have come to realize is that intuitively we know those relationships that are unhealthy in our lives- the best thing you can do to those relationships is to break them. For instance, any relationship that is built on sex should be broken without a second thought. There is no need for painting the truth.
Any relationship that is generally abusive either (physical, verbal or sexual abuse) is unhealthy and should therefore be broken. It is only on this planet I see men beat up ladies and call it love; they say love cannot grow without a fight. That is a lie from the pit of hell, which is immaturity in its highest level. Cut off if you like your life.
Love is not symbiotic i.e. give and take but relationship should be. Any relationship that is not symbiotic is most times parasitic. Any relationship that is not improving you is not worth it. Quit!
Let him or her that has an ear hear. But please any relationship that you want to break shouldn’t be done arrogantly but with wisdom. Because you might need to pass through a door again you shut violently. Be wise!

THE GOD OF THE BAD BOYS

People tend to believe that God is only a God of the righteous and holy people. But against popular belief, God is also a God of the bad boys. And this has been proved from the history of man.
Even Jesus himself said he came for the sinners, He said people that are hail and hearty do not need doctors, rather those that need doctors are the unhealthy. If you lost a coin out of hundred, scripture speaking, won’t you light up a candle, take a broom and search for it? Will you because of ninety nine forget about one?
I wouldn’t know why, but I know that God always has a soft spot for bad people- Almost all of Jesus’ disciples were bad boys before they became disciples. Zacheaus was a tax collector but Jesus dinned in his house and that of so many other sinners. Paul of tarsus was a persecutor of Christians but became an instrument in the hand of God. You could term him- “From persecutor to propagator of the gospel”.
David was an adulterer, a stunk one at that but the bible describes him as a man after God’s heart. God uses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise.
God does not consult your past to determine your future. God is not a respecter of persons he is always in the ministry of turning useless to useful, trash into treasure, mess into message and dirt into identity.
Remember, whatever enters into the hand of God is no longer bad. In fact, God does not call the qualified, he qualifies the called.
If we come to this truth, we will no longer condemn people; we will no longer feel that we are better than others. We will accept every body in the house of God. We will truly be converted and come back to God. There is no kind of person God has not used- Fornicator, adulterer, drunk, smoker, blasphemer, murderer, fraudster or whatsoever you may be into. And there is no kind of person he cannot use.
The more reason why God needs you as a bad boy/girl is so that your experience can become a message to turn others to him.
Just like the father of the prodigal son, God is always with open arms waiting for you to come in. He is not far, you are the one that is- Draw near to him, and you will find that he is where you left him.

WOMEN WAKE UP!

Via keen observation and research, I have come to realize that a lot of women are sleeping and need to wake up. I am not talking about physical sleep but potential-sleep.
This article is not geared towards belittling women or to seek gender balance but to awaken the sleeping giants in our ladies.
A lot of our ladies are adding to the wealth of the grave. Gone were the days where women were not allowed to speak in public or spear head a project. Now everybody (gender) has equal chances to succeed. Yet we still find uncountable amount of house wives who have neither vision they are running with nor any purpose that is driving them. We are no longer in the masculine world!
If you look carefully, you will find out that we have very few ladies that are ambitious. Many of them are still hiding under he umbrella of ‘Help mate’. 80% of people controlling things in the world are men. Look at the music industry, look at the political industry, economic, media and social industry. They are all controlled by guys. In my discipline for instance- psychology, no woman propounded any school of thought. The first 50 richest people are men. What a gender misbalance!
Despite all the theories that states that men have more potential for leadership than women and the one that states that men make us of their brain more effectively than women do, both genders were created in the image and likeness of God. The difference between a man and a woman is that women are womb-men. So women wake up! You have a purpose and a reason for existence, pursue it. You were not just created to give birth and become house wives.
You didn’t go through the rigors of school to get that certificate just for you to end up in the kitchen? You can become the next mother Theresa, Oprah Winfrey, Mary Slessor and the rest. You can become more than a figure head queen (of England). You can produce something intellectual. You can become all God wants you to be.
Venture into the education industry, cause a change in the political arena, affect the socio-economic industry.
You can become more than a sex object. You are a special piece, a royal priesthood, a holy nation.

THE DECEITFULNESS OF SIN

I have come to realize over the years that sin is not as powerful as we think, it is more deceitful than powerful. In fact it is its deceitfulness that makes it powerful. Sin is first deceptive before is destructive.
If sin can open our eyes to show us how destructive it is, nobody will have anything to do with it. But the reason we do not see how destructive it is, is because it is very deceitful. Just like sugar is sweet but so many have forgotten that it also causes diabetes, pile and all the rest. You can be carried away by the sweetness of sugar and forget about the pain of diabetes. Sin show us the pleasure but we fail to see the pain. And it would have been better if the pleasure of sin were more than the pain but it is not. Instead the pains are more than the pleasure. Note that the pains used is plural while the pleasure used is singular.
I am sure that if that lady knew that she was going to be pregnant out of wedlock she wouldn’t have had that sex. I am certain that if that boy had known that he was going to contract Hiv/Aids he would have run for his dear life. Am also convinced that if that young man had an idea that he was going to be sentenced to life in prisonment, he wouldn’t have robbed that bank or murdered that person. But all these people didn’t see all that, all they saw was the money, the excitement, the pleasure and the mood change. That is how deceptive sin is.
So many people have lost their destiny to 5min pleasure. I am sure they preferred their destiny to the pleasure but because they didn’t know that they sold their birth right via the deception of sin, they gave in to it. Sin will never paint how bad it is, it will only paint those things you can benefit from it. Sin is a powerful communicator and a good marketer/sales man. It showed Eve how beautiful and sweet the apple will be, it will show you how pleasurable and heaven-on-earth that sex will be. It will show you how far that money can go, it will show you how exposed you will be, how much benefit, excitement and fun you will get, but it will never show you how you may die, how you may lose your womb, how addiction may catch up with you, how you are losing your identity and the rest.
But you know what? You have no excuse now, because you now know the deceitfulness of sin, you now know that it may be sweet now but regretful later. The ball is now in your court. Decide whether you want to play now to pay later or whether you want to enjoy pleasure now to suffer pain later or the other way round. The choice is yours!

WHAT IF...

Just thinking...
What if Mary the mother of Jesus aborted the pregnancy of Jesus? Or what if Joseph had deserted and dejected her? What if Elizabeth gave Mary the wrong advice? What would have happened to humanity if Jesus himself refused to come to the world to die for our sins? Just thinking...
Have you also sat down to think about what would have happened to philosophy if Socrates, Aristotle and Plato were busy psyching all the girls in their vicinity? Just thinking...
What if Bishop David Oyedepo rejected the call of God over his life? What if T.d Jakes became an engineer or a medical doctor? Just thinking...
What if Nelson Mandela contracted HIV through illicit sex at a teenage age? What would have happened to South Africa? What if Martin Luther king (jnr) impregnated a girl when he was an adolescent? What would have happened to the black race? What if Mahatma Ghandi was a sex addict? Would India have had a future? Would the dream of Martin Luther King (jnr) have come to pass had it been Barrack Obama was a drug addict or drug trafficker? Just thinking...
What if Oprah Winfrey became sexually promiscuous after she was sexually abused at the age of six by her own uncle? Would Joyce Mayer have become an inspiration to anybody if she had committed suicide after being raped by her own father? Just thinking...
What if Helen Keller had settled for the status quo, considering the fact that she was blind, deaf and dump? Would there have been anything like the light bulb if Thomas Edison had considered the fact that he was totally deaf in one ear and 90% deaf in the other? Just thinking... Are you also thinking?
On the reverse, still thinking...
What if that driver on the street discovers the reason for his existence and pursues it, would he still be a driver on the street? What if that taut (agbero) got the right information and stayed in the right environment while he was growing up? Still thinking...
Don’t you think that boy/girl hawking sachet water and orange on the street could have been the next Bill Gate or the next Kathryn Kumar? Still thinking...
Please with tears in my heart- Do ‘not fail your generation; we are all looking up to you. Cheers!

DIFFERENCES MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND

Try to imagine how this world would have looked like had it been everybody were the same in every way. Imagine how it would have looked like had it been we were all the same gender, we all had the same values and principles, the same love language, temperament type and so on. This world would have been so stereotype. But thank God for differences.
If we were all men, everybody would have been so logical, masculine and analytical. Differences make the world go round. On the other hand, if we were all women, this world would have been so emotional, fragile and lousy. Differences make the world go round.
Imagine we were all Choleric, this world would have been a boxing ring where everybody will be ordering each other. Smile and laughter would have been celebrated like Christmas. What if everybody was a Sanguine, there would have been nothing serious on the face of the earth; this world would have been turned into a play ground. While if we were all melancholies, wow! We would have all been moody, analytical, perfectionist and depressed. What a world it would have been if we were all Phlegmatic, this world would have been so boring, we would have all been super sleepers, slow and sluggish and everybody would have been trying to please each other. Ah! Thank God, for differences make the world go round.
Come to think of it, if everyone was good starters but bad finishers this world would have been filled with abandoned projects; in fact we wouldn’t have had anything significant. On the other hand, if we were all good finishers but bad starters, there would have been nothing to finish because we would have started nothing. Differences make the world go round.
Imagine if everybody had the love language of ‘Quality time’, we would have time for every other person except ourselves. What if we all had the love language of ‘words of affirmation’, the world would have been so rowdy and noisy. What if we all had ‘act of service’ as our love language, we would have been doing everything for everybody forgetting to do for ourselves. What if we all had ‘Receiving gift’ as our love language, nobody would have been an entrepreneur because we would have been giving out products for free which will lead to bankruptcy. What if we all had ‘Physical touch’ as our love language? There would have been high level of sexual promiscuity. Differences make the world go round.
We can keep going on and on just to buttress the fact that differences make the world go round. One of the greatest gift God gave us is our ‘DIFFERNCES’. Despite our complains sometimes and our misunderstanding based on our differences, if we were not different from ourselves, this world would have become something else. Thank God for making us different. DIFFERENCES MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND!
Try to imagine how this world would have looked like had it been everybody were the same in every way. Imagine how it would have looked like had it been we were all the same gender, we all had the same values and principles, the same love language, temperament type and so on. This world would have been so stereotype. But thank God for differences.
If we were all men, everybody would have been so logical, masculine and analytical. Differences make the world go round. On the other hand, if we were all women, this world would have been so emotional, fragile and lousy. Differences make the world go round.
Imagine we were all Choleric, this world would have been a boxing ring where everybody will be ordering each other. Smile and laughter would have been celebrated like Christmas. What if everybody was a Sanguine, there would have been nothing serious on the face of the earth; this world would have been turned into a play ground. While if we were all melancholies, wow! We would have all been moody, analytical, perfectionist and depressed. What a world it would have been if we were all Phlegmatic, this world would have been so boring, we would have all been super sleepers, slow and sluggish and everybody would have been trying to please each other. Ah! Thank God, for differences make the world go round.
Come to think of it, if everyone was good starters but bad finishers this world would have been filled with abandoned projects; in fact we wouldn’t have had anything significant. On the other hand, if we were all good finishers but bad starters, there would have been nothing to finish because we would have started nothing. Differences make the world go round.
Imagine if everybody had the love language of ‘Quality time’, we would have time for every other person except ourselves. What if we all had the love language of ‘words of affirmation’, the world would have been so rowdy and noisy. What if we all had ‘act of service’ as our love language, we would have been doing everything for everybody forgetting to do for ourselves. What if we all had ‘Receiving gift’ as our love language, nobody would have been an entrepreneur because we would have been giving out products for free which will lead to bankruptcy. What if we all had ‘Physical touch’ as our love language? There would have been high level of sexual promiscuity. Differences make the world go round.
We can keep going on and on just to buttress the fact that differences make the world go round. One of the greatest gift God gave us is our ‘DIFFERNCES’. Despite our complains sometimes and our misunderstanding based on our differences, if we were not different from ourselves, this world would have become something else. Thank God for making us different. DIFFERENCES MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND!

JUST A LITTLE KISS

Philosophy: “Just a little kiss, a little touch, a little holding of hands to hug so shall sex come unto you like a bandit and promiscuity as an armed man”.
It is good to know that strong men and women are emerging; men and women that think they can kiss and smooch but never have sex. How can a rule of a relationship state that ‘we can do every other thing except sex’. If you don’t want to play why do the fore-play. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a step, therefore the journey of sex does not begin with sex, it begins with a kiss, a peck, a hug. How can you say you don’t want to hear noise yet you are heading to the market, so also how can you say you don’t want to have sex yet you are kissing and smooching. Let’s stop deceiving our selves.
Kissing and smooching is like taking a bus from Lagos to Abuja, Lagos is kiss and romance while Abuja is sex, and Lagos is the departure point while Abuja (sex) is the destination. Why enter the bus of where you are not going. Come down (Alight!).
Like my mentor Praise Fowowe will say, “When a guy kisses you, he has conquered your lips, when he touches your breast he has conquered your breast, when he romances your body he has conquered your body”. The day a building falls is not the day it started falling! The day you had or have sex is not the day you fell, you actually started falling when you began to give room for kiss & romance. You are not stronger than Samson Manoah, you are not wiser than Solomon, and you are not as brave as David Jesse. Run for your dear life!
Quote: “The journey to sex addiction starts with some minutes of kiss and romance. The best time to stop a thief is when he is at the gate not when he has entered your bed room”. Be wise!

THE VIRTUE OF VIRGINITY

Once upon a time, in the country called Nigeria, virginity was held in high esteem, it was cherished and preached. According to the stories of my father, if a young man married to a damsel, a white cloth was placed on the bed of the couple to make sure that the lady was a virgin, if she wasn’t, it become a shame to the family of the girl, the parent especially the mother of the girl is seen as irresponsible because she was not able to teach her daughter the right moral values. But if she was a virgin, the cloth that was placed on the bed of the couple is now carried with the blood on it to the family of the girl congratulating them for their heroic effort in ebibing good moral values into the lady.
But like I started the article, it is once upon a time? All these are now history. Infact I never met this when I was born, today reverse is the case; virgins are seen as aliens, dummies and morons. While sexually active teenagers and adolescent are seen as smart, clever and wise. Virginity has been displaced in our society. Right moral values are not more being incocated in the lives of our young ones. What are we doing about this? I am not saying we should start placing white clothes on the bed of new wedded couple; I am talking about building the right culture and values. We are no longer placing values on the right things. Virgins are now even feeling inferior to those who are virgin, sometimes they even go ahead to lie just because they want to feel among. If you are a virgin carry it with all pride and dignity don’t be ashamed to tell necessary people that you are a virgin.
What will be special on you wedding night if you have been sleeping with your fiancé or fiancée before hand? Nothing. Why do you think God placed an hymen on your virgina? Do you think it is a product of mistake? If it were some people would have had hymen while others wouldn’t have had. But 99.9% of ladies have hymen, so it is a deliberate act of God. You cannot be wiser than God. He wants that hymen to broken by one person-your husband.
Lets liken the virgina to be land; as far as I know, every land has an owner and every land that doesn’t want intruders is properly fenced. You are the owner of you land, the fence on you land is your hymen anybody that wants to intrude is a stranger. Once the fence of a land is destroyed, it has lost its protection. It will be easily molested. Please, I beg you, cherish your land. I am sorry if you are not a virgin, but God is always available to get us back on track, it’s all about you.

THE GENTLE MAN

The gentle is not man that wears a three piece suit; the gentle man is the man that is courteous.
The gentle man is not that handsome gorgeous man, the gentle man is that man that has discovered his reason for existence.
The gentle man is not that man with six packs and broad chest, the gentle man is that man that will protect a lady with it.
The gentle man is not that man that is fluent and eloquent, the gentle man is that man that knows how to talk to ladies and people.
The gentle man is not that man that is a phlegmatic introvert, the gentle man that man that will never lay his hands on a lady.
The gentle man is not that man that has a degree, the gentle man is that man that will never abuse nor rape a lady.
The gentle man is not that man that is Melancholic in nature, the gentle man is that man that is gentle in spirit.
The gentle man is not that man that has read books the gentle man is that man that has become a book that others can read.
The gentle man is not that man that has communication skills and oratory power. The gentle man is that man that understand ethical and life skills
The gentle man is that man that has control over his emotions, will and mind. The gentle man is that man that has a strong relationship with his creator. The gentle man is that man that is matured spiritually, emotionally and mentally. The gentle man is that man that will learn and increase in learning, he is that man that has killed his ego and has allowed God to lead him
Here comes the big question. Are you a gentle man?
Quote: “The woman came from a man’s rib not from his feet to be worked on. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected and next to the heart to be loved”

BEAUTIFUL . . . YET COVERED?

I am beginning to wonder if beauty is synonymous to nudity. Can I be covered and yet beautiful? Questions like these pop in my mind as I walked around and was that over 40% of ladies were revealing a part of their private part.
Is it that we can no longer deduce the difference between private and public part? The Webster dictionary defines private to be (1) restriction to the individual: PERSONAL (2) carried by individual independently while public is defined as: exposed to general view. In a layman’s definition, we can say that our private parts are those parts of the body which is not for everybody to see and touch, while public parts are those parts that can be seen and touched by everyone. With these definitions can we say we understand the difference between public and private parts?
I agree with the fact that we have all seen that breast of Beyonce and Shakira, I do not argue with the fact that lady Gaga exposes her body, but another fact that you should agree with is that Mitchel Obama has never exposed her body, I have never seen the queen of England or any other queen show us her cleavages. So who do you want to be?
There are so many causes of rape, but one of the integral ones is nudity. Guys are moved with what they see. Why flaunt what you are not ready to give. Private offers are not for the public, so it is not advertised, it is only sold to the stake holders of the company, so no outsider is permitted to make a demand. But when a private offer begins to be advertised, it is no longer a private offer, it has become IPO (initial public offer). Keep what is private private and what is public public. When you begin to flaunt your private part as a public part, then people have a right to make a demand. Lets take clothing back to its original purpose which we were told in social studies – to cover our nakedness, not to reveal them.
It has been proved that more than 90% of people who dress nude are suffering from inferiority complex, they want to be noticed and look attractive but that’s not the best way to be noticed or to look attractive. I have discovered that you can be covered and yet beautiful, even more beautiful than those who are exposing their body.
Hear what Muhammed Ali told his daughter Hana: “Hana everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to. Where do you find diamonds? Deep down in the ground, covered and protected. Where do you find pearls? Deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell. Where do you find gold? Way down in the mine, covered over with layer and layers of rock. You’ve got to work hard to get them”. He looked her with serious eyes. “Your body is sacred. You’re far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too”.